It has been almost 2 weeks since I first posted about my husband’s affair on my blog…Everyone keeps asking me how I am doing and the honest answer is…I have no idea. A lot of things have happened in the last week including my husband moved back into the apartment. We are trying to be civil to each other which I found to be easier then I thought. It is almost like we are still dating but he’s in love with another woman. It’s weird….and part of me thinks I am coping well because I realized so many years ago that we were toxic.
What I struggle with the most is caring. There are times I wish I could just shut off my emotions, I have days where I am an emotional wreck and he comforts me and I feel guilty. I think we both realize we are better off as friends but neither one of us wants to say it out loud. I find myself feeling like I am doing something wrong because I still care about him but I have had multiple people tell me its okay to care for an ex. There are days where everything is fine and other days where I can barely pull my self out of bed which is why self-care is so important. I’ve been forcing my self to eat, drink and go to my appointments. Everyone says time heals and I can only hope that is true.
I am only doing an update to let people in a similar situation know that it does get better. In the short, almost 2 weeks since posting I have noticed a difference. It gets easier every day to get out of bed…I worry less about forcing our relationship. I don’t know the future and I figure I can’t spend all my time stressing out about it.
What I did learn though is that it WASNT the end of the world and I survived………